"Life does not come wrapped in a pretty bow, but it is a gift." - Florence W. Katz
Top 10 Tips for a Happy 2016
(1) Be Present. Be Exactly Where You Are. We spend much of our time with our minds somewhere else. Recognize when you are ruminating about the past or worrying about the future. Anchor yourself in the now. You can do this by simply focusing on your breath for a few minutes or on your body. You may start to realize that where you are is exactly where you should be, which is actually a very pleasant and peaceful place to be!
(2) Accept the Uncertainty of Life. Much of our stress and anxiety comes from trying to control our lives and our future. However, we cannot change the often unpredictable path that our lives take. The only thing we can do is accept it fully and recognize that no matter how hard we try to control it, life just happens. Once we accept the uncertainty of life, we can start to get unstuck from the "if only ‘s" or the waiting game or the endless attempts to micromanage what we cannot control. Instead of fighting against what is, or wishing things were different, or making our happiness dependent upon someone or something, we can lean into what is, learn from it, accept it, embrace it and venture onward.
(3) Believe in Yourself. The number one stumbling block we face is self-doubt and a lack of confidence in our own abilities. Everyone has a wealth of inner strengths, but we must first recognize them in ourselves before we can share them with others. Take a little time at the start of this New Year and simply recognize that you already have all that you will ever need to succeed, you just have to believe it.
(4) Be Kind to Yourself. You as much as anyone else, deserve your own kindness. Embrace and love your perfectly imperfect self.
(5) Be Kind to Others. We never really know what is going on in other people’s lives. The best we can do is give others the benefit of the doubt and offer them kindness. We are all doing the best that we can. One quote that I think of often is, “Be kind to unkind people. They need it the most.” Or, as the Dalai Lama says, “Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.”
(6) Take Care of Yourself. Your health and wellbeing is most important. Don’t put yourself at the end of a long list of people to take care of and of things to do. If you don’t take care of yourself, you cannot take care of others. So, always put your own oxygen mask on first, and then you will be all set to help others with theirs.
(7) Breathe Deeply. Nothing works better to relax your mind and your body, and ground you in the present moment, than a long, slow, deep breath. Think about the fact that your body’s natural instinct when you are overwhelmed or stressed is to sigh. That happens for a reason. It helps you slow down your body and your mind so you can reset and move forward with a greater sense of calm and thoughtfulness. When feeling stressed or anxious, try taking a deep inhale through your nose for 5 counts, then sigh deeply and slowly, loudly exhaling for a count of 8. Repeat this for three minutes and notice both your body and your mind slowing down and relaxing.
(8) Don't Take Yourself Too Seriously. Sometimes we get so caught up in what we are doing, or in the decisions we are making, that we lose perspective of how unimportant what we are currently dealing with actually is in the broader scheme of life. We get so buried in the minutia of daily life, that it helps to take a giant step back and look at the bigger picture, evaluate what is really important and what our goals actually are. Another favorite quote, "Don't take yourself too seriously. No one else does."
(9) Let Go. Get rid of that excess baggage. Regret, anger, resentment, the “if only’s” of life, or the “I will be happy when. . .,“ these are heavy and exhausting to carry around. Start your New Year out a lot lighter and let those go. Forgive yourself, forgive others, live in the now, accept what is, and you will greatly lighten your load in 2016.
(10) Laugh Often! Nothing quite compares to getting caught in deep, uncontrollable laughter, the kind where you try to stop laughing but you just can't, the kind that emanates from deep in your belly then takes over your entire body and finally seeps out through streams of tears gently moistening your face. They say that laughter is the best medicine, and this is true in fact. Researchers have proven that laughter can lower stress, improve blood flow and keep your heart healthy. So, try to find more opportunities to laugh in 2016. That's a prescription for happiness in the year to come.
Weekly Wisdom #49
Choose Happiness
So many things affect our ability to be happy. Or do they? Once we recognize that happiness is a choice, and not a result of what happens to us, our ability to find happiness becomes much easier. What can make us unhappy, and how we can choose to respond . . .
People - We cannot control how other people act, but we can choose how we allow them to make us feel. Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Ultimately, we can choose to limit the time we are around people who do not bring happiness and positivity into our lives.
Circumstances - Giving up the illusion that we have control over many aspects of our lives is the first step. Once we accept that, a great burden is lifted from our shoulders (ahhh. . . .), and we can focus instead on how we want to respond to those circumstances.
Stress - When it comes to all of that stress in our lives, it is not the stressor itself, but how we perceive it and then how we choose to respond to it that will determine whether or not it will lead to stress at all.
Worry - Worrying does nothing to help the situation. As a worrier myself, I know this to be true. Once we recognize that our worrying is not serving us, we can take action, or take a deep breath, and stop worrying so much.
Money - The "If only" syndrome . . ."If only I had [fill in the blank]. I would be happy. " One look at the news and you will see examples of wealthy people, who have enough money to buy whatever material goods they want, and you see so much suffering. Enough said. Happiness is an inside job, as Sylvia Boorstein says, and not a result of external circumstances.
How we walk through our lives is all about choice, and how we choose to see things. Yet, we are often so busy running on automatic pilot, acting from a place of habitual response and routine patterns of thought and behavior, that we don't even realize we have a choice. As Viktor Frankl put it best, in Man's Search for Meaning, "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom.”
Easier said than done, you say? It's easier than you think.
Below is a reposting of a favorite Weekly Wisdom from Tal Ben Shahar, author of Happier, reminding us that we have the power to choose . . .
Choice is creation.
To choose is to create.
Through your choices you create your reality. At every moment in your life you have a choice.
We can choose… to focus on faults OR to be a benefit finder.
We can choose… to look at what is not working or to look at what is working.
We can choose . . .to take things for granted OR to appreciate the good.
We can choose . . . to perceive failure as a catastrophe OR as a learning opportunity. We don’t have a choice whether we fail at times, but we do have a choice of what we do with that failure.
We can choose . . . to run away from challenges OR to courageously face challenges.
We can choose . . . to be cynical and sarcastic OR to be open and sincere.
We can choose . . . to overlook the potential OR to see the potential and cultivate it.
We can choose . . . to reject emotions OR to accept emotions.
We can choose . . . to be mean and dismissive OR to be nice and kind.
We can choose . . . to overlook life’s treasures inside and all around us OR to be mindful of the wonder and the miracle unfolding within and around us.
At every moment in your life you have a choice. All these moments add up to a lifetime; choices add up to a life – – – your life.
What kind of life do you want for yourself? For those around you?
To live the life you want you must first become mindful that you have a choice.
Weekly Wisdom #48
"The grass is always greener where you water it." - Unknown
Growing Pains
Our children experience growing pains as their bodies undergo the incredible transformation from child to adult. As parents, we also experience growing pains, those aches and pains of the heart that we feel while watching our children grow from babies to fully formed adults. Just as our children must learn to deal with their sporadic aches and pains of growth, we must also learn to deal with the joys and the pains of our journey through parenthood.
With newborns, I was often sleep deprived and exhausted from the physical demands and the daunting responsibility of nurturing a tiny being that depended on me for its very survival. I don't miss my diaper bag or the large circles under my eyes, but I do miss listening to that unbridled laughter, and holding that tiny ball of warm flesh curled up, fast asleep in my arms. Next came toddlerhood and temper tantrums, the refusal to be buckled into a car seat until I practically had to sit on him, and the beginning signs of finicky eating. It also brought those precious first words and hilarious sentences as he attempted to express his thoughts and feelings, watching his pure joy in simple playtime, and soaking up the smell of his freshly bathed skin wrapped up in cute little pajamas sitting on my lap, captivated by a bedtime story.
How quickly they grow! Before you know it, that cute little toddler was off to school. As I reluctantly released his tiny little hand from mine, and watched him take his first steps toward independence, I felt a small pit in my stomach and an ache in my heart, fully aware that this was just first of many steps I would take in letting him go.
I have been told by many friends and family members whose children are grown about the great joy I will experience watching my children become fully independent adults. And, I have been warned of the tremendous hole their departure will leave in my heart. They look longingly at me (usually when I am complaining to them about the eighth carpool I have driven that day) and say, “Enjoy these days. The time goes so fast and before you know it, they will be gone.” So, I continue to do my best to be present and enjoy each phase of our lives together, and meet the demands of where I am now, which happens to be parenting teenagers.
Yes, I am on the rollercoaster of parenting teenagers, which certainly has some unique growing pains for everyone involved. As parents of teens know well, some days teenagers are the kind, sweet children who look at you and just need a hug, some advice and a warm meal. Other days it seems whatever we say is wrong and not worth their time. Or, a simple look or question like, “How was your day?” Brings an annoyed response like, “Why do you always ask me that? ” Leaving me dumbfounded as to how my attempt at simple conversation became an annoying intrusion into their lives, and wondering where that warm little mound of flesh that sat so sweetly on my lap has gone?
I have learned that being the parent of an adolescent requires a tremendous amount of patience and understanding, and lots of deep breathing. I have also learned that I am not alone, and there is great strength in sharing and connecting with other parents who are experiencing similar growing pains. It is also helpful to remember how I felt as a teenager when I too thought my parents were clueless and annoying (sorry mom and dad). It’s just hard to believe that I am now that “clueless” and “annoying” parent. I somehow thought that through proper parenting I could avoid such interactions. I now know, however, that this teenage behavior is an essential part of growing up. Not only a rite of passage, but also a necessary, developmentally appropriate step toward independence.
Gretchen Schmelzer's Letter Your Teenager Can’t Write You is a beautiful reminder to parents of what our teenagers are experiencing. It helps to hear their voice, even if they cannot or will not formulate these words themselves. It expresses what they need from us, and how we can be there for them through this difficult time in their lives.
THE LETTER YOUR TEENAGER CAN'T WRITE YOU. . .
Gretchen Schmelzer, June 23, 2015
Dear Parent:
This is the letter I wish I could write.
This fight we are in right now. I need it. I need this fight. I can’t tell you this because I don’t have the language for it and it wouldn’t make sense anyway. But I need this fight. Badly. I need to hate you right now and I need you to survive it. I need you to survive my hating you and you hating me. I need this fight even though I hate it too. It doesn’t matter what this fight is even about: curfew, homework, laundry, my messy room, going out, staying in, leaving, not leaving, boyfriend, girlfriend, no friends, bad friends. It doesn’t matter. I need to fight you on it and I need you to fight me back.
I desperately need you to hold the other end of the rope. To hang on tightly while I thrash on the other end—while I find the handholds and footholds in this new world I feel like I am in. I used to know who I was, who you were, who we were. But right now I don’t. Right now I am looking for my edges and I can sometimes only find them when I am pulling on you. When I push everything I used to know to its edge. Then I feel like I exist and for a minute I can breathe. I know you long for the sweeter kid that I was. I know this because I long for that kid too, and some of that longing is what is so painful for me right now.
I need this fight and I need to see that no matter how bad or big my feelings are—they won’t destroy you or me. I need you to love me even at my worst, even when it looks like I don’t love you. I need you to love yourself and me for the both of us right now. I know it sucks to be disliked and labeled the bad guy. I feel the same way on the inside, but I need you to tolerate it and get other grownups to help you. Because I can’t right now. If you want to get all of your grown up friends together and have a ‘surviving-your-teenager-support-group-rage-fest’ that’s fine with me. Or talk about me behind my back--I don’t care. Just don’t give up on me. Don’t give up on this fight. I need it.
This is the fight that will teach me that my shadow is not bigger than my light. This is the fight that will teach me that bad feelings don’t mean the end of a relationship. This is the fight that will teach me how to listen to myself, even when it might disappoint others.
And this particular fight will end. Like any storm, it will blow over. And I will forget and you will forget. And then it will come back. And I will need you to hang on to the rope again. I will need this over and over for years.
I know there is nothing inherently satisfying in this job for you. I know I will likely never thank you for it or even acknowledge your side of it. In fact I will probably criticize you for all this hard work. It will seem like nothing you do will be enough. And yet, I am relying entirely on your ability to stay in this fight. No matter how much I argue. No matter how much I sulk. No matter how silent I get.
Please hang on to the other end of the rope. And know that you are doing the most important job that anyone could possibly be doing for me right now.
Love,
Your Teenager
© 2015 Gretchen L Schmelzer PhD- reprinted with permission
So, I continue to remind myself how difficult it is not only to be the parent of a teenager, but to be a teenager. I continue to take lots of deep breaths, send them my love, my understanding and my forgiveness, try not to react from a place of anger but with compassion, and offer them my presence for the joys and the growing pains of adolescence.
Introducing - 2bp TV!
Check Out 2bp’s New YouTube Channel
We are thrilled to announce our new YouTube Channel! In the coming months, we will continue to add new video shorts explaining the science of mindfulness, the “How To’s” of integrating mindfulness into your life, more on mindfulness for children, and lots of new guided meditations and instructional videos to help you lower stress, improve your focus and concentration, overcome test anxiety, get a better night’s sleep, prepare for that big game, create more meaningful family time, and so much more! Be sure to sign on to our newsletter to get updates on what’s new and subscribe to 2bp TV.
All New 2bp TV !
Announcing 2bpresent's All New You Tube Channel!
We are thrilled to announce our new You Tube Channel! In the coming months, we will continue to add new videos explaining the science of mindfulness, the “How To’s” of integrating mindfulness into your life, Mindfulness for Children, and lots of new Guided Meditations and Videos to help you lower stress, improve your focus and concentration, overcome test anxiety, get a better night’s sleep, prepare for that big game, and so much more! Be sure to sign on to our newsletter to get updates on what’s new and subscribe to 2bp TV.
Weekly Wisdom #47
Life is so much brighter when we focus on what truly matters.
Sowing Seeds of Happiness
Did you know that today is not only the first day of Spring (hard to believe for those of us awaiting another snow storm), March 20th is also International Day of Happiness?! So, whether the snow is falling or the sun is shining, try to sow these Six Seeds of Happiness into your day today! 1. Spread Kindness & Compassion - Look for ways to recognize other’s accomplishments, needs and difficulties. Find small, simple acts of empathy and kindness that may lighten their load. Remember, they have loads too! Open a door, smile and say thank you, show your appreciation, lend a helping hand. Kindness is contagious. Your acts of kindness will not only warm the hearts of those around you, they will warm your heart too.
2. It's not always about being right. As Anne Lamott says, "It's better to be kind than to be right." Try letting go of the need to be right (even if you are) and simply be kind to that person with whom you have a disagreement. Sometimes kindness is the best way to resolve a conflict and spread some happiness.
3. Be Present - Our stress and anxiety almost always come from thoughts of regret, anger or sadness about something that has already happened, or rumination about something that might happen in the future. These thoughts are rarely about things that are actually happening now. So, let those thoughts go and focus on what is happening in this moment, and find joy in where you are and who you are with right now.
4. Reach Out and Touch - In the immortal words of Diana Ross, "Reach out and touch somebody's hand and make this world a better place, if you can. Take a little time out of your busy day to show a little love to someone who may have lost their way." (You can click on the link above and sing along with Diana Ross like I have been doing all morning -- apologies to my children.) Enjoy a nice long hug with your child, spouse, parent or friend and simply share a moment of togetherness. Call that friend or relative that you have been meaning to call. Human connection, as positive psychologists will tell you, is one of the key components of happiness.
5. Count Your Blessings - Gratitude is the best way to turn a frown upside-down. We all have so much to be grateful for, but we lose sight of those things when our lives get busy. So, take a moment to think of five things you are grateful for - a roof over your head, food in your belly, someone who loves you, clean laundry, or even your breath. Whatever it is, big or small, notice it, appreciate it and let gratitude bring a smile to your face.
6. Sing, Dance, Play! Close the blinds, crank up the music and dance, sing and let loose! Life can be stressful and we all need time to have some fun. Choose something that makes you smile and make time to do it. You deserve it!
Weekly Wisdom #46
"Remember happiness doesn't depend upon who you are or what you have; it depends solely on what you think." - Dale Carnegie
Share the Love
On this day before Valentine's day, I am feeling inspired by the incredible evening I had last night at the JCC in Manhattan. I was thrilled to attend an evening with Sharon Salzberg entitled, "How Meditation Changes the Lives of Inner City Youth." Sharon was joined by the three founders of the Holistic Life Foundation, a nonprofit organization committed to nurturing the wellness of children and adults in underserved communities. Andres Gonzalez, and brothers Atman and Ali Smith, the co-founders of the program, spoke about their journey to bring yoga, mindfulness and meditation to the inner city youth of Baltimore. Many of these children live in a world of crime, drugs, poverty and violence. These incredible men have changed the lives of so many young people by sharing their love, showing them respect and by teaching them tools to cultivate compassion, empathy and resilience. So, on this day before Valentine's Day, a holiday filled with flowers, chocolates and romance, I am deeply reminded of the incredible power of love --- how it feels, how healing it can be and how important it is to share it freely with others. Happy Valentine's Day to all and may your day be filled with lots of love!!!New Mindfulness Meditation Daytime Class
Come out of the cold and find some inner peace . . .
There are many mindfulness tools and practices we can use everyday to help us lower our levels of stress, stay focused and calm, and live with a greater sense of ease and happiness. Join us as we learn these tools, practice each week and discuss how to put them into practice in modern life.
This course is designed for those looking to gain a deeper understanding of mindfulness practices, as well as those looking to meet with a group to practice together. The class will consist of a discussion and guided meditations.
Join us for this new 4 week course in which we will learn and practice together!
Class Dates & Times: Four week session begins Wednesday, February 25th. Classes will meet on 2/25, 3/ 4, 3/11, and 3/18 from 11 am to 12 pm.*
*A minimum number of participants is required to run the course.
Four Class Series Registration click here.
Weekly Wisdom #45
"I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become."- Carl Jung
Join us in Sharon Salzberg's 2015 Meditation Challenge!
I am thrilled to be a guest blogger again this year on Sharon Salzberg's 2016 Real Hapiness Meditation Challenge. During the month of February each year, thousands take the pledge to sit and meditate everyday. Now in it’s sixth year, this REAL HAPPINESS Meditation Challenge is an amazing community around the world exploring what meditation has to offer. Jump in and join me and thousands of others around the world, each day in February as we find a warm and cozy spot to sit and find our inner peace. You can read more about it by clicking here
Weekly Wisdom #44
Choice is creation. To choose is to create.
Through your choices you create your reality. At every moment in your life you have a choice.
We can choose… to focus on faults OR to be a benefit finder.
We can choose… to look at what is not working or to look at what is working.
We can choose . . .to take things for granted OR to appreciate the good.
We can choose . . . to perceive failure as a catastrophe OR as a learning opportunity. We don’t have a choice whether we fail at times, but we do have a choice of what we do with that failure.
We can choose . . . to run away from challenges OR to courageously face challenges.
We can choose . . . to be cynical and sarcastic OR to be open and sincere.
We can choose . . . to overlook the potential OR to see the potential and cultivate it.
We can choose . . . to reject emotions OR to accept emotions.
We can choose . . . to be mean and dismissive OR to be nice and kind.
We can choose . . . to overlook life’s treasures inside and all around us OR to be mindful of the wonder and the miracle unfolding within and around us.
At every moment in your life you have a choice. All these moments add up to a lifetime; choices add up to a life – – – your life.
What kind of life do you want for yourself? For those around you?
To live the life you want you must first become mindful that you have a choice.
– Tal Ben Shahar, author of Happier
How Meditation Can Change Your Brain
Over the last ten years, researchers and scientists have been uncovering the physiological benefits of meditation on the brain and the body, benefits that practitioners have understood for thousands of years and western scientists are now proving. This research quantifies and scientifically demonstrates the amazing benefits of meditation practices that can improve our overall health and well-being. A new Harvard study using MRIs shows that meditation literally builds the brain's gray matter. In this study, researchers found that daily mindfulness practices resulted in a major increase in gray matter density in the hippocampus, the part of the brain associated with self-awareness, compassion, and introspection, and those same practices decreased gray-matter density in the amygdala, which is known to play an important role in anxiety and stress. In the November 2014 issue of Scientific American, entitled The Neuroscience of Meditation - How it Changes the Brain, Boosting Focus and Easing Stress, researchers also found that experienced meditators had a greater volume of brain tissue in their prefrontal cortex and insula, which both play a role in executive functioning and decision making, as well as processing attention, sensory information and internal bodily sensations.
Not only does meditation affect the brain, it may also play a crucial role in our overall health. Researchers from Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore, MD sifted through nearly 19,000 meditation studies, and found that mindfulness meditation can help ease psychological stresses like anxiety, depression, and pain. (Click here for more information on this study) In addition, scientists have found evidence that meditation and its positive psychological effects boost immunity, and reduce inflammation and other signs of stress in the body, even those occurring on a molecular level. A recent study at UCLA - Davis looked at the effect meditation practices have in the body on a molecular level. The enzyme telomerase is associated with the long-term health of cells in the body. Telomeres are sequences of DNA at the end of chromosomes that tend to get shorter every time a cell divides. When telomeres drop below a critical length, the cell can no longer divide properly and eventually dies. One of the central mechanisms responsible for the aging of cells is the shortening of telomeres. The enzyme, telomerase, can rebuild and lengthen telomeres. Researchers found that experienced meditators, those showing the least physiological signs of stress on the body, also had higher "telomerase" activity, suggesting that mindfulness meditation training might actually slow down the process of cellular aging and improve our overall health on a cellular level.
This research is welcome and fascinating, and we love to learn about the science and share it with you. We look forward to more research to come, but for those who practice mindfulness meditation, we don't need to be convinced, we already feel the great benefits of these ancient contemplative practices.
The Dalai Lama's Laugh
It is Thanksgiving time again. Time to gather with friends and family to celebrate and give thanks for all that we have. This time of year, however, is also full of stress and anxiety for many who are rushing around preparing for the holiday season. Time with family and friends, and holiday travel, also bring challenging situations, annoyance and for many a feeling of sadness. Although this is a time for giving thanks for all that we have, it is sometimes difficult to feel grateful in the midst of the stressful holiday season. So what does all of this have to do with the Dalai Lama's laugh, you may ask? I recently had the great pleasure of spending two days with the Dalai Lama in New York City. I sat in a crowded theater with hundreds of others listening to him speak. When I first arrived, I was surprised to hear protesters outside the theater chanting loudly that he was the "false Dalai Lama." As we were ushered into the crowded theater, we were searched for dangerous objects before being allowed into the room. This was all a strange and disturbing beginning to a day with the the winner of the Nobel Prize for Peace. When I finally arrived at my seat, excited to be in the presence of such an important historical figure, the Dalai Lama began his lesson in Tibetan. For the first 20 minutes, and throughout the two days, he spoke in a language I could not begin to understand. Then, when his interpreter began to speak in English to translate his words, it seemed that even English was not going to help me truly understand the complicated teachings of Dependent Origination and Intrinsic Existence. As I struggled to understand his existential teachings, I found myself captivated by one thing - the Dalai Lama's laughter.
Many of us shared the same experience that day. There was something about his deep, joyful belly laugh that seemed to exude happiness. This is a man who has lost his country, who bears the burden of continuing the Tibetan culture and its spiritual teachings, who, at 79 years old, lives in exile and travels the world sharing these teachings to hundreds of thousands of people, and who has the fate of an entire culture in his hands. And yet, despite the tremendous burden he carries, he manages to sit happily, with a radiating smile, filling the large theater with his laughter. This alone was worth the price of admission.
Back to our own Thanksgiving tables. The Dalai Lama's laugh is a great example of how our own happiness need not be defined by our circumstances. Despite our suffering, our challenges or our difficult circumstances, we too can choose to find happiness and laughter. As the Dalai Lama says, "Happiness is a choice." There are simple ways to find joy in each moment. For example, we can simply take a deep breath and enjoy the fact the we can take a breath. I often think back to when my mother was ill and I found tremendous joy on mornings when she could simply breathe with ease. This simple act of gratitude is easily forgotten when life gets busy. But the ability to take a slow, deep breath is something to be very thankful for.
Another way to bring gratitude to Thanksgiving is to look at the food on our table and think about everyone who has contributed in some way to our meal -- the famers in the field, the animals in the farm, the food company employees who produce and package our food, the truck drivers, the grocery store clerks, the cashiers, the caregivers and cooks who prepare it, and those who worked to make money so the food could be purchased. Each and every person played a part in getting this food on the table for us to enjoy. This brings a great sense of interconnectedness, interdependence and a feeling of appreciation and gratitude to our hearts. Try thinking about all the people who contributed in some way to your Thanksgiving meal, from its very beginning in a field somewhere in the world to your plate.
On to a more challenging gratitude practice - dealing with difficult people. Even the difficult people in our lives can help us find gratitude and happiness. Pay attention to the person in your life who causes you discomfort or unease, and try to find something that person has done for you, directly or indirectly, that brings you joy. They may have brought someone into your life who you love very much, or perhaps they make someone you love very happy. Whatever it is, recognize it and be thankful for it. It is also helpful to recognize that even the people who are most challenging for us are also just searching for their own happiness, and are often struggling in their own way to find it. Opening the door to compassion for them, will also help us find our own peace and happiness.
Bah Humbug! Why even try? All this effort to cultivate gratitude can actually pay off. Dr. Rick Hanson, a neuropsychologist and author of Hardwiring Happiness, has spent years studying the brain and has found that we can actually change our brains and create more happiness in our lives with practice. We can cause our neural machinery to cultivate positive states of mind. This is known as “self-directed neuroplasticity.” Neuroplasticity refers to the malleable nature of the brain. Dr. Hanson has found that we can change our brains to be happier by deliberately training the mind to appreciate the good that is all around us. What better time to start practicing happiness and hardwiring your brain for positivity than Thanksgiving.
So, this Thanksgiving, practice laughing out loud like the Dalai Lama and take the time to look around or inside yourself and notice a few things that you can be truly grateful for. Whether it is your breath, your health, your children, the food in front of you, the sun rising, or the person sitting next to you, simply take the time to notice how fortunate you are and give thanks for that good fortune.
Weekly Wisdom #43
"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have." - Frederick Keong
Mindfulness at Work
Mindfulness at Work
Helping People and Companies Thrive
2bpresent uses the latest research from the fields of Neuroscience and Psychology, combined with Mindful Awareness practices to teach people the skills they need to thrive at work and in life.
2bpresent's Mindfulness at Work Program:
- Enhances Performance at Work through Heightened Emotional Intelligence
- Cultivates Outstanding Leadership Skills
- Creates a Corporate Culture of Cooperation, Innovation & Resilience
- Increases Happiness and Health of the Individual and the Organization
Mindfulness Training is the foundation of building Emotional Intelligence. The latest research shows that mindfulness training helps individuals increase their ability to manage stress, to improve focus, to manage difficult emotions and to resolve challenging situations.
As Kate Pickert wrote in the February 2014 Time magazine cover story, The Mindful Revolution, “most leaders…feel besieged by long work hours and near constant connectivity. For these people, there seems to be no time to zero in on what’s important or plan ahead.” Mindfulness training can help leaders slow down, focus, skillfully solve problems and make better decisions.
Mindfulness Benefits Individuals: In our world of hyper-connectivity constantly pulling our attention and focus in many different directions, we need to learn to:
- Slow down in order to concentrate on what is important;
- Focus our attention and energy; and
- Access our creativity and innovation to meet the demands of an ever-changing world.
In order to access our greatest potential to meet these demands, we must first learn to
- Raise our self-awareness and understand our emotional responses;
- Create a greater sense of clarity and calm; and
- Connect to our purpose and goals.
Mindfulness Benefits Organizations: Mindfulness training helps
- Employees and business leaders develop a greater sense of interconnectedness, cooperation and compassion;
- Companies create a positive corporate culture of cooperation, innovation and resilience; and
- Improve the overall health of the organization and its individuals
2bpresent's Mindfulness at Work gives organizations the tools to build a more effective work environment with a greater sense of productivity, efficiency and the capacity for intelligent decision-making and skillful leadership.
About the Instructor:
Cheryl Vigder Brause has a degree in Economics from the University of Michigan. Upon graduation from college, Cheryl worked as an investment banking analysts for Goldman Sachs. She then earned her law degree from New York University School of Law. Cheryl worked as an attorney for several years in Manhattan practicing corporate litigation, white-collar crime and public interest law. She has had many roles in her life, but her most challenging and rewarding job yet — mother of three children. The culmination of her life experiences in the corporate world and as a busy parent led her to explore a personal yoga and meditation practice. The life-changing effect of these practices and her desire to share the amazing teachings of leaders in the field of meditation and mindfulness, inspired her to co-create 2bpresent. Cheryl has studied meditation and mindfulness under the guidance of many leaders in the field. She is trained in Learning to BREATHE and Mindful Schools Curriculum Training. She has completed her Level I and Level II Meditation Teacher Training from Om Yoga. Cheryl has studied MBSR and Buddhist Psychology, as well as Neuroscience and Positive Psychology. She has also participated in Search Inside Yourself, Google’s Mindfulness-Based Leadership training. Cheryl is a motivational speaker, and teaches mindfulness and meditation privately to children, teens and adults, as well as to businesses and organizations. She has created and taught programs in and around New York to train executives, teachers and students in stress reduction techniques and mindfulness tools to help them thrive. It has been through her daily practice of yoga, meditation and mindfulness that she recognized that it is the journey itself, and not the destination, that matters most. She is thrilled to be taking this journey 2bpresent and sharing it with you.
What people are saying about 2bpresent Programs:
“Every now and then you come across a class or a person who helps you to be a better person. Cheryl offers just that. I am a better person because of all the things that I have learned- I am a better spouse, a better mother, a better friend, a better co-worker, and actually even more compassionate with myself. And what’s the best part? That I got all this by simply learning how to slow down and calm down. I will be forever grateful! Taking the beginning meditation class is the single most important thing I have done for myself in the last decade. I can honestly say that my family and I are all happier because of my taking this one step to learn how to be calmer and more mindful.” – Psychologist, participant in Real Happiness and Mindful Living
“Cheryl’s class taught me not only how to meditate, but how to incorporate mindfulness into everything that I do. Cheryl is extremely knowledgeable about the practice of mindfulness and has a teaching style that is very easy to understand and accessible. It was a truly life changing experience. I can’t wait for my next class!” – MBA, participant in Mindful Living
“I took Cheryl’s mindfulness class last spring and the effects have stayed with me. The tools and techniques she showed the classes were fun and easy to use and the discussion really brought everything down to a real level that can be applied. Cheryl has a unique way of speaking about mindfulness that is very insightful and practical. I thoroughly enjoyed the class and would highly recommend it!” - Organizational Development Consultant, participant in Mindful Living
Mindfulness at Work Programs
6 Week Mindfulness at Work Program:
This 6 Week Program consist of six, 45-minute lunchtime sessions. In each session, participants learn new Mindfulness tools each week and discuss the science behind how and why mindfulness practices decrease stress, increase clarity and focus and improve overall wellbeing. 2bpresent teaches tools to increase self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, and empathy, as well as tools to foster cooperation, compassion and creativity. These classes include guided mindfulness meditation practices and exercises each week so that participants experience first hand the benefits of the practices. They also will experience the added benefits of a lunchtime class that will help to reduce stress, relax the body and increase clarity, focus and wellbeing.
Mindfulness at Work Executive Workshop:
A 2-hour workshop to kick start your program and introduce key Mindfulness concepts and practices. This hands-on training will help participants better understand the science behind mindfulness meditation, and give participants the opportunity to learn and practice mindfulness tools to help them lower stress, increase their focus and attention and improve their overall sense of wellbeing.
Custom Fit Programs - Design Your Mindfulness at Work Program:
We can work with your organization to custom design a Mindfulness Based Program to help your employees and your business thrive.
Please contact us at info@2bpresent.com for more information.
